its been quite some time since i was alone like this for a full week. the first two days were great, spreading my wings and feeling all that space around me. and now slowly its getting to me. more so, because school is out and there's not much to do. not much routine that is. i can for sure think of at least 3 things to do that were waiting for exactly such time on hand. but after a full semester i've never been known to myself to be able to continue to work. no, not even learn latex, for which i never before seemed to have the time. i'm simply not inspired to work these days. blame it on the weather, warm and humid, or whatever; its actually just me. and i do love the mornings and evenings, its the afternoons when i shut out every dot of natural light, and stay cooped up in my artificial weather. and get drowsy after lunch, tired of watching movies, sitcoms, trying to read academic papers, or Fuchsia Dunlop's memoir, or playing wordruggle, or checking my email continuously waiting to hear from the elusive Canadian consulate.

and for the last 2 days, at exactly the same time in the afternoon, no matter where i sit in this apartment, with whatever to do in hand, i eventually find myself dozing. with nightmares. and i literally have to drag myself up after more than an hour only to feel disgusted with myself, with a horrid aftertaste in my mouth of sleeping after a meal. today - with a lot of fig-seeds stuck all around my teeth and gums. ugh.

not that i haven't been getting out. yesterday inspired by a movie in which a writer takes a break in a country-house in France where she goes shopping with a pretty basket for food, i set out early morning with my cotton environmentally-friendly, 'love the earth' shopping bag and got some good stuff from my favorite farmers' market. but the trip back made me feel so like a coolie, it totally deflated my spirit, that was already puzzling over why a Texan law stopped me buying alcohol (just some cider!) on a Sunday morning.

its not been all bad though. the morning runs have been great, given that without hubby, i can actually get out even before the sun (thanks to the naps in the afternoons). and with the delayed spring the new route runs parallel to the wildflowers in purple, yellow, pink, and the single-petaled red poppies.

and then this is the only time i've been alone when i'm actually inspired by food. i bought Brussel sprouts for the first time in my life, hoping i could do something with it to change the impression i've been given of it being typical 'eat these if you want to ...' veggies. and i got some beautiful tangy sun-dried tomatoes, to die for. its been a cooking binge as well - with some Middle Eastern shakshuka, Moroccan style eggs, an original multicultural dahi-baingan recipe, and today, still licking my fingers with this



a recipe from Hunan province of China, penned down by Dunlop here.



of course i altered it a lil to make do with what i had - not pork stomach, but tiny pork stew pieces from god knows what part of the body. and disobeyed the author and added salt much before it should have been added to suit my Indian palate. in fact, the picture on the cover happens to be the same dish, although mine looks much different; i added different greens to garnish and my star anises are lost underneath somewhere cos mine seemed to be only broken pieces (bought some years ago from Crawford market in Bombay). but the result was a yummy hot and sweet slow-cooked pork dish with caramelized sugar, chili and soy sauce leading the flavors. which i ate to accompany a documentary about adopted Chinese girl-children around the US and the world. the movie made by a woman who herself adopted a lil infant girl, made for her new daughter, for when she grows up and has questions, many of which will go forever unanswered.

all in all its been quite a Chinese day. that's what i like about this country, the melange of people, of customs, of cuisines, of cultures. i think i'm losing my knack of whipping a quick Indian dish that is also scrumptious. or maybe those skills are just lying low for a while cos it has been some time i really wanted to cook some Indian fare. but even if its withering away, in its place is coming a wide range of lip-smacking flavors. i'm rethinking whether my call in life is to explain pricing dilemmas in little-informed markets, or to host a little cottage with cusine-of-the-day. but for that i will have to learn how to sweeten the tongue after a hearty meal, and i still do not even have the faintest idea how they make either a bread pudding, crunchy golden palmiers, or the stick-to-your-teeth&gums (so you can enjoy the taste for a long time) baklavas.