there is some (one) logic behind the desi arranged-marriage concept.
years ago i told a friend my theory that two people had to have common languages and culture in order to feel an intimate togetherness. in order to relate with common memories, in order to commonly feel and understand on the same scale. such that each knows the other understands (almost) just as well as oneself and that the other knows this and so on... (at least most of the stuff communicated most of the time). something like the common knowledge assumption of game theory. its important for a relaxed and take-understanding-for-granted strategy required in a relationship that outlives chemical and sexual introductions.
and although the greater the commonality of experience in both lives, the richer the present and future sharing will be, commonality is (obviously) not a sufficient condition for compatibility. chemistry and sex are just as necessary.
probably that's why desis have a greater range of compatibility with the world than say the chopsticks people (for lack of a better non-racist term). its either the comfort with the English language (or whatever) that makes us more aware of, and connected with the world, arming us with a larger bag of common goodies. unlike the chopsticks armed who have lived in their closed world and if you are from beyond that, you are alien to them (although they are way more western than us in their clothing).
no wonder a political psychologist I met some months ago was of the opinion that because of the adverse sex ratio in China and the influx of Chinese students in the US, Chinese men students come here looking for Chinese women.
8 comments:
The chopsticks people??!
:) JC what's up?
though all from those countries would be called Asians, but then so am I. and btw I'm a fan of their food and of their chopsticks. have become adept at it too now
chopsticks people
heh
political psychology sounds like a cool thing to do
i have visions of armies using chopsticks to subdue revolutions, probably handing bowls of ramen along side
the western clothing you can thank Chairman Mao for
KK shut up ;)
i will but really, the adoption of western clothing - actually the rejection of chinese traditional dress - was part of Mao's idea of "progress" to rid the Chinese of anything that reminded them of an older, "underdeveloped" country
hmm thanks. what about the other countries down south east and Japan. they are all alike in this
its actually cultural. read this http://www.hostelbookers.com/article/travel-for-women/asia/
dunno about the rest, but Japan had its own version of throw-our-culture-away with the Tokugawa regime
as in fact Turkey has done recently, which Pahmuk has written about
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